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Saturday, March 13, 2010

Use the Tax Code to boost your sex life

Yes, believe it or not, you can use the Tax Code to improve your sex life.

No, it’s not going to get you a date, but it will get you going and improve your performance.

Let’s start with the easy stuff. Just ask anybody who lived through the 60's what Birth-control pills did for ones sex life. These tiny little pills are legitimate, allowable medical deductions.

So, too, are those little blue pills that treat erectile dysfunction. And, if you have an erection that lasts more than four hours, your trip to the doctor is deductible at 16.5 cents per mile.

Medically prescribed sex therapy, including the use of surrogates where legal and appropriate, should also be allowed.

If you suffer gender identity disorder (GID), sex-reassignment surgery and hormone therapy have both been court-approved medical deductions.

Psychotherapy and professional counseling to improve your relationships are allowable deductions.

Equipment prescribed by your doctor to deal with a physical impairment is also deductible. That could include anything from vacuum pumps to adjustable beds.

And if you forget the tiny little pills and have kids, and want to permanently shut down the baby factory, tube tying, whether done to a male or female, is an allowable medical deduction.

Eliminating the fear of pregnancy should make it easier to enjoy your time alone with your partner.

Contact lenses, eyeglasses, false teeth, hearing aids and artificial limbs are all deductible. And they all make you much more attractive. OK, I admit, that last one might be a bit of a stretch but hey, it's my blog.

Overweight? The cost of a prescribed diet to the extent it exceeds the cost of a regular diet is allowable.

Unfortunately, purely cosmetic surgery is not allowable. That includes breast augmentation and even amounts paid to whiten teeth discolored as a result of age.

Aren't you glad that I helped make taxes more enjoyable?

From Jeff Schnepper on MSN Money

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